A lot of people read this blog because I always try to put a silver lining on tough stuff. But some days I fail to live up to the image. Yesterday was one of those days, when I let a 7-year-old get the better of me.
We’re not sure what it’s about, but since it happens every year between December and March, it’s not a stretch to conclude there’s a winter-related cause.
Yesterday he was unfocused when he needed to be getting his homework done. He had a Cub Scouts meeting early and that put some added pressure on us. When he does his homework, you really need to stand over him. But I always struggle with this, because the OCD pushes me to do seven things at once, especially on a tight schedule.
So Duncan kept fooling around and doing his homework in an excruciatingly slow manner.
So my voice started to get a little louder every few minutes. And Duncan still stayed all over the place.
So then I really snapped at him.
I didn’t hit him. We don’t believe in hitting our kids. But I yelled. A lot.
I nixed his going to the Scouts meeting. That was appropriate, since he still had too much homework left and that comes before the fun stuff.
To some or most of you all this may read like a typical afternoon with children. Kids get a little out of control and the parent in the room has to open the can of whoop-ass.
But to me, it was a loss of control. Worse, I feel like I should be A LOT more patient with the boy, since he’s under the same spell I’m under.
Whatever it was, I didn’t feel good about it.
I am thankful for a few things, though:
–We’re getting Duncan evaluated by a medical professional to see if he has any disorders. Whatever the verdict, we’ll get some direction on how to help him along.
–Duncan is a sweet boy, and it’s impossible to stay mad at him for long. Especially when he gives you a big hug and apologizes for being difficult.
–Erin was a calming presence, reminding me that this is a particularly bad winter and everyone is on a short fuse because of it.
–At the end of the day, I kissed my wife as she was leaving for a school board meeting, I tucked Duncan into bed and got some one-on-one time with Sean.
–There isn’t the thick, stinking cloud of rage hanging in the air. Love wins out over anger.
Because of all these things, this family is going to be just fine, thanks.
Even if I can’t always get my shit together.