Thank You

I still go through the day like a punk sometimes. I get wrapped up in my own selfish impulses and forget everyone else around me. I’m excellent at making it all about me. But I know the truth. I have a beautiful life despite myself. And I have many to thank.

Mood music:

I’m thankful to God for taking a chance on a rat like me and for sending me the grace to help me be a better man.

I’m thankful to my wife and kids for loving me unconditionally and helping me see the magic in life.

I’m thankful to my parents for sticking by me when I was a kid, even though I gave them plenty to worry about. That’s right. Both parents. Even though I’m not talking to one of them right now.

I’m thankful for an army of friends that seems to grow by the day. That includes all the new friends I’ve made because of this blog, old friends who’ve always been nearby and friends I thought were gone forever but somehow came back into my life.

I’m thankful to Sean Marley for showing me how to live way back when no one else could get through to me.

I’m thankful for my recovery from OCD and addiction. My recovery is challenged every day. Some days it bends. Some days it burns. But it hasn’t been broken.

I’m thankful for music.

I’m thankful that God showed me how to break the spell of fear and anxiety.

I’m thankful for the 12 Steps.

I’m thankful for the city of Haverhill for accepting me for who I am.

I’m thankful for the city of Revere for always welcoming me back.

I’m thankful for people who forgive.

I’m thankful for my job. Many people don’t have one, and the truth of the matter is that I have the best job in the world. I could feel guilty. Instead, I’m just grateful.

I’m thankful for the therapist who helped me understand what mental illness is about — and what it’s not about — even though I walk in his office wearing my bad habits and smug attitude on my sleeve.

I’m thankful for the Secret Service guys who hassled me in Washington D.C. over the summer because they gave me a fun story to tell.

I’m thankful to Howard Schmidt for honoring my family with a private tour of the White House West Wing.

I’m thankful to all my friends in the security world for fighting the good fight every day and for making me smarter than I ever thought possible. 

I’m thankful for everyone who could have judged me harshly for writing this blog, but instead gave me nothing but support from day one.

Finally, I’m thankful to be alive. There were many times as a kid that I wasn’t sure how I’d ever see 21, let alone 40.

Yet here I am.

Thanksgiving used to be all about the food in my twisted little mind.

Now the food is a mere distraction from all the blessings around me.

Thank you God.

Thank you everyone.

It’s good to be alive.

4 thoughts on “Thank You

  1. Great post Bill!! So very true..Sometimes all we experience in life gives us a new and clear perspective on things and teaches us “grace”. That is the true secret to happiness. I thank YOU for sharing so openly, for your candid blogs, your hilarious stories about your children and your wonderful outlook on life…you know what is important. ~ Lauren

  2. Thank You for being there when I feel alone. You are such a help to me. This Thanksgiving will be my 11th sober one and most of the time my OCD isn’t driving me Batshit! I am so Thankful that for all the mistakes I have made, there are still people who still care for me. I am Thankful that in my sobriety I can mostly forgive myself for the harm that I did. I never thought I’d make it to 56. I wish my parents had lived to see me sober, but my son has and that truly is something to be Thankful for. And that he still loves me.
    Blessings, Peace, Joy and Health…not necessarily in that order:-)

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